Saturday, April 9, 2016

Fair: Day 2

Fair day 2 was MUCH better!!
The weather was beautiful.
It had rained earlier in the day, and the air was fresh and cool.
No direct sunlight!!


 The girls went on pony rides!!
They also went in the bubbles.
The teenage boy in charge was so sweet and cute with them.
He earned the tip I stuffed in his jar!!



 They got Mardi Gras face paint.
Brent was trying tp convince them to get the Mike Tyson tattoo!!
I quickly put an end to that!!

We found the NDOW cut out!!

 Ella is short and very resourceful when she realizes she isn't tall enough.
She dragged a chair over to take her picture,
but the cut out kind of leaned forward and she was about to pitch forward,
hence my arm!!

Scarlet was so excited because she thought this was literally Brent after he stood behind it.
She thought it was Daddy's uniform!!
It is kind of close!!
We took this pic fast cuz I was trying to hold her up and hide at the same time!!

This night was so pretty and we weren't tired or cranky.
It was much better and I'm glad we were able to go up!!
So much is coming up soon!!
School only has 7 1/2 weeks left.....
Holy crap!!
I am so excited to have the girls home and we are buying some water toys!!
I'm not so excited for the heat.
Hence the water toys.
If you me on a slip n slide,
don't judge!!

Friday, April 8, 2016

Rant and Rave

I try to promote mental health awareness.
I feel like knowledge is understanding.
The more we understand each other, the more we can show kindness and compassion.
Unfortunately, there are still narrow minded, ignorant people.
There is a very low chance that any of those people will ever change their mind,
and they truly are entitled to their opinion,
but if I can convince someone to at least hold their tongue,
or hold back a flippant remark,
then I have done something.

Mental health sucks.
I'm sure there is a more eloquent way to phrase that,
but I am choosing to not sugar coat it.
It sucks.
Plain as that.
Depression
Anxiety
BOTH
Bipolar
Chronic Fatigue
Fybromyalgia
PCOS

These are chronic illnesses.
They are diseases.
They are real.
And they are hard.

 A day out could be a lot of fun.
Or it could be cripplingly exhausting.
Somehow it's socially unacceptable to just feel tired and act tired.
We always have to pretend it's ok and put on a happy face.

 And while we have to pretend to be happy,
and not talk about our illness,
we have to have compassion on those who don't have a clue what's going on in our heads or bodies.
I acknowledge your problems and I understand that they are important to you,
and I will show you sympathy and compassion,
just reciprocate those emotions.
Even if you 'don't get it'.

 It's exhausting and overwhelming.
I am not seeking attention.
As a matter of fact,
I am trying my hardest to stay away from attention!!
Most of the time I am just thinking too damn much.

 NEVER. EVER.
Tell someone this.
NEVER. EVER.
Tell them to get over it.
Or 'choose to be happy'.
Yes. I CHOOSE to feel like this.

 The ever lurking paranoia that some sinister health problem lurks below.
Sometimes it's funny and I laugh.
Sometimes I'm trying to bury the fear that is real to me.

 Now I do not categorize myself as sick.
I feel like I am currently in recovery,
with good and bad days.
But I do have flare days, and no I can not just snap out of it.
Or 'just get up and do something and then you'll feel better'.
If you do not have this, you DO NOT understand it.
It's ok!!
You don't have to try.
Just be nice.
And don't judge.



Now I will agree that some will let their condition define them,
or take no actions to cope with it.
But where have they been?
What brought them to that point?
If it is truly just beyond your capability to find compassion,
or too hard to not pass judgement,
then at least keep it to your self.

And to all those out there who feel the kind of tired sleep can't fix,
keep fighting.
That's all we can do.
Keep fighting.
Find someone who doesn't judge.
Find someone who loves you.
Reach out to those who are starting down the dark and confusing road.
Tell your story.
And at the end of the day, at least you tried.

Clark County Fair

It's fair time again!!

 Brent was a good sport and chaperoned Ella's class this year.

 Ella was really excited to find a lady bug!!

 Scarlet and I came up later.
She loved all the chickens.
My mom decorates with A LOT of chickens.
Like we had some concern for awhile.
Scarlet kept telling me she wanted to show Grandma all the chickens!!

 We decided to go to the Carnival early in the day so we could beat the crowds,
(and get it over with....)

 We. Roasted.
The girls had so much fun tho!!
Ella's getting a little big for the kiddie rides, but has NO interest in the big rides.
Even after the kiddie rides she complained of being dizzy and sick to her stomach.
I have never liked rides so I understand!!

 She did love the slide tho!!!
.

 SO did Scarlet!!!
She wasn't tall enough to go on her own, so we had to buy some tokens for Brent to go with her.


 I feel bad because we went threw the rides once and then all of us were done.
The girls were hot, tired, hungry, and thirsty.
And so were me and Brent!!

We were roasted.
Well, the white people were roasted!!
Ella and I were fine!!
Scarlet gets bright red in the heat but doesn't burn.
Once she cools off, her cheeks go from rosy to tan.
Brent, however, is white, or red.
His body doesn't know how to tan!!

I usually enjoy the fair.
I don't LIVE for the fair like some of my friends.
It's fun and something to do,
but I don't go up every day, all day.
Nor do I want to!!
This year was a little unsatisfying.
It was hot.

We are going back up this evening to watch Ella dance,
I'm going to do all I can to guide our evening toward fun!!