Friday, February 28, 2014


Ella has been begging her Grandma Bowler to teach her to sew.
They set a day and this is what Ella made!!

 She cut out all the blocks and Grandma says she only had to help guide her for the first 3 squares and then she went all on her own!! Good job Ella!! I'm so proud of her little skills!!

A few months ago I decided to make the plan the of combining the girls into the big bedroom when summer comes. The little room is poorly cooled in the scorching summer sun and I wasn't going to let Scarlet go another summer roasting her little kitty brains out.
SOMEONE (Ella) taught SOMEONE ELSE (Scarlet) to climb out of her crib!!!
I couldn't let her escape anymore so I figured I would just bite the bullet and put them together now!!
So we decided to do room combination AND big girl bed all at the same time!!
Go big or go home right?

 Scarlet is in the big bed and Ella is in the "day bed" until we can get a twin mattress. I thought confining Scarlet to the corner would be the best idea for now!!
Good thing Ella is little so she can fit in the "day bed".
We had to rename it from "the crib". 
She was quite offended when I made the suggestion she sleep in a crib for a few weeks.
It's a day bed now. 
Like the ones princesses nap in.

I hauled in Scarlet's giant dresser while I was at it.
Now we have a bedroom and a play room!!
All the toys stream lined into one room and out of my way!!

Saturday, February 15, 2014


My little fairies decided to play in the back yard.
I figured since it's 80 degrees out side, they didn't need extra clothes!!!

 Ella the pink fairy.

 Scarlet was a Snow White/ Aurora/ green fairy.

 Who was eating something green and slobbery and nasty!!
Ella does NOT like sugar. Won't even try it.
Scarlet does NOT have that problem!!

 They dressed up daddy!!
It takes a man very secure in his masculinity to agree to pink fairy wings!!

 He switched out to the devil horns eventually.
Scarlet looked at him and started laughing.
"Daddy a donkey!!"
Apparently his fearsome devil ensemble looked like donkey ears to her.

He chased them with his "devil wand".
I'm glad Brent is so willing to play with his little girls.
They love him so much.

Pony Lessons

I have been trying to find an extra curricular activity for Ella.
We've tried a couple and they have all ended in disaster.
A lady advertised pony lessons on Facebook at the beginning of the year, and we jumped on it!!
The first lesson she was terrified the pony was going to bite her.
Her father is also terrified of farm animals. He thinks they're natural born killers.
I grew up on my Grandpa's farm so that is not something I fear!!
I am sad that my girls won't be able to have the same experience, another reason I thought riding lessons would be a good idea!!

 She's doing great!!
I think she's developing a sweet little bond with this horse.
His name is Thunder.
He nuzzles at her and she scratches his neck and his eyes go all lazy.

 Even though he is obviously a very small pony, Ella is also very small!!
At first she was very hesitant to make him do what she wanted and he would want to wander to the nearest grass clump for a snack!!
She has since learned to make him mind. On last weeks lesson, when she was leading him, he tried to wander off and gave him a firm push to the nose and scolded, "No snacking for you!!"

She is getting so big!! 
Kindergarten will be over in 4 months and I'm not sure how I feel about that. 

Saturday, February 8, 2014

This Veil of Tears

We received bad news this morning that one of my cousins had passed away. The cousin who called to let my mom know asked her to please call all of the other siblings, all 7 of them, to please let them know what had happened. Threw the inter locking network of family, we learned that another of my cousins has a very young (3 or 4) daughter who had a cancerous tumor on her kidney and is now undergoing chemo therapy.
I sat down will grief in my heart. None of these things are happening to me but I mourn for them. I can’t even comprehend a child so sick. I don’t want to imagine losing my brother. Now, I have something like 30 first cousins and another 30 plus first cousins, once removed. But these people are my family!! I played with them, or more they played with me, I was the littlest. They were kind and loving and smart.
Most importantly, they were God’s children and I have compassion on them as mortal souls.

When I as in high school I longed for the day when I could grow up. I wanted to live with adults who didn’t judge harshly or only support the popular kid. I thought life would balance and would become clear and easier. I wanted friends who loved me, not ones that I had to keep one eye on or they’d stab me in the back. I didn't want to be sold out to whoever was better. I didn't want to play the popular game anymore.
Well, I am an adult now, and I can not say that those games have gone away. And life is not easier. The hurt hurts so much more and the grief is so much deeper. And I ask you, Why?

Why, as women, as humans, are we not constantly supporting each other? We know how hard life can be as a wife, mother, sister, daughter. Why are we not applauding each other’s success? Why are we not consoling each other’s failures? Why do we think we are better than each other? Why do want to be? Why do we not see jealousy as it is, and hope for our best, while congratulating our successful sister.
We should be fighting to be OUR best. Not our neighbors better. And most definitely not our FRIENDS better. It is a tragic case to be so threatened, or so envious of another that it brings malice to our heart.
I am a flawed woman. I have many faults. I sin. I make mistakes. I would hope that those who even vaguely cared for me would want what was best for me. Not to be only worried that I have something they don’t. Or be delighted while I stumble.

I am tired of not being perfect. I’m tired of my children not being perfect. I’m tired of comparison. I’m tired of feeling bad because I am not held in a certain esteem because I don’t have something or wear something or drive something.

I’m angry that grown women who are mothers have the nerve to judge my children for their faults. Or worse, their home or their clothes or their hair. My worst nightmare is that my children will become vain, self centered women who are only worried about how they look. They are too afraid to take out the trash with out make up for fear someone might see them!! That they will only promote physical beauty to their children instead of what is important. Be nice, love everyone, never judge someone by their home or car or clothes. Never be mean.

I am consoled by the knowledge that My Father in Heaven does not have favorites. He doesn't care who is thinnest. Or who has the biggest/nicest house. Or who has the smartest/prettiest/bestest children. He cares if we have good hearts. If we serve others with pure intentions. If we love unconditionally and forgive our fellow man.

People disappoint me sometimes. I am grateful for those who do not. Bless you. Bless all the pure in heart. I sat with shock and horror today while I learned of the tragedy in the lives of those that shared the same blood with me, and I thought of how little we have here. We have so little and we take it all for granted. Life is so fragile and I complain about my children and my husband and my house. I worry about what someone else thinks or said or what I said. It is all just non sense. I want to take this into my heart and vow to have peace, love. I want to serve those in need and comfort the weary and the grieved. I don’t worry about the what other people think for the most part, but I am absolutely not going to worry now. I will worry about if my family is happy, healthy and I will make sure they know how much they mean to me.

Today has been filled with emotion for me. I have taken a moment to recognize life before me and it has been startling. I don’t know why these experiences have been so profound when it seems every day I am made aware of a new tragedy or trial of  the human race. It’s not about me. It’s just about seeing a little more and more clearly every day and keeping my face turned to the light. The darkness behind me will only become darker and eat up more of the light as I age. I will feel it. I will know it’s there. But I do not want it to be the way before me. I want to only be apart of light, graciousness and understanding. I do not want to be apart of anything else.

Friday, February 7, 2014

The Journey of Sight Words

Ella and I started sight words a few weeks before Kindergarten started.
I had heard about them and saw the dread they instilled in the common mother, so I thought I should get a jump on them!!
She started school knowing the first 3 columns.
2 months into school she passed off column 4.
Her class didn't really do much with them and randomly she passed off 5 sometime before Christmas.
When the homework calender came home for the month of January it reserved every Wednesday for practicing sight words so they could be passed off on Fridays.
So we did!!
One week at a time we passed off the last 5 columns!!!
Ella worked very hard, especially when I told her if she passed off the last 5 columns in 5 weeks I'd buy her a toy!! I like to think of it not so much as bribery, but as motivation!!

I am very proud of her and her hard work.
She also has an amazing memory and I am so thankful for that!!
Good job Ella!!

Monkey Bars

Wednesday after school, we decided to stop at the park.
It was a pretty day and the girls needed a few minutes to get their wiggles out!!

 Scarlet was very excited to tryout the monkey bars!!
She has freakishly strong upper body strength!!

 She had so much fun!!

 Ella got in on the action.

 She was able to spin around the bar and lay over it and do all sorts of tricks!!

 They begged us to take a turn!!
Brent has a really strong upper body so no problems for him!!

He did not attempt the tricks!!

Now where might my picture be?
I stepped up to the bar and jumped up, pushing my arms straight.
I'm pretty agile, so I swung my leg over with confidence.

*Back story- 6 years ago, when I was 10 weeks pregnant with Ella, I got pneumonia.
I coughed so hard I dislocated 3 ribs and had to have my chiropractor pop them back into place.
I have had issue with them since!!

As I bent awkwardly to lift myself to an upright position, I felt a deep, cramping, pulling pain. 
I looked up at Brent with a face filled with horrified pain.
Just as he snapped my picture.
So that photo has been deleted.
He peeled me off the monkey bars and we both remained calm as I lifted up my shirt to behold my ribs creating a protruding lump from my stomach.
I pressed down hard and snapped them back into place.
Needless to say park day ended as I mourned being OLD and  (currently) chubby.
My chiropractor did a mega adjustment Thursday morning and I'm sore as hell.
But at least everything is back where it's supposed to be!!
Because, did you know that when your ribs leave their appropriate place, your hips, spine and neck follow!?
Cuz they do!!