Monday, July 20, 2009
Things I Don't Understand
I have been thinking about all those girls that are having a hard time conceiving and I am sad for them. I didn't realize it was so common. But I can think of 6 people close to me just off the top of my head. As hard as pregnancy, labor and delivery, birth and parenthood has been; I feel like every woman should be able to have this experience. Nothing is more special than feeling little kicks inside your belly. Or that rush of relief when she finally slides out and the physical pain is over. Or the first time I held her in my arms or when she figured out how to nurse. Of coarse there is GER and the constant crying that comes with that, mounds of diapers, spit up, weight gain, and all sorts of other difficult things. But I still think that EVERY woman should be able to have the chance! The chance to know it for themselves. To see those eyes gaze up at you with complete trust and love. For all those poor women who have struggled, who have cried, have lost hope or are too afraid to hope, I am so sorry for you. I am so sorry that it has been so hard and hurts so much. It isn't fair and I have deep sympathy for your pain. I wish it could be different and that the loving women of the world would not have to have empty arms. They are the ones who deserve it. They are the ones who deserve babies. I know that their hearts would love them more than anyone can imagine. Because only a mother knows how much a woman is capable of loving.
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6 comments:
ditto.
Celestial is one of the many... she tries not to lose hope. But every month reality hits her and she doubts whether she will ever be blessed with a child.
ToOdLeS.
I have lots of those friends too. And it makes me feel guilty that I can have babies and they cannot. It really is cruel that so many people have babies that really should not have them and then there are those who really want them and do everything they can, and they still cannot.
I have a friend who is in Denver right now under going her last round of IVF - they've been trying to conceive for 3 years. This is their last chance. Thus, you posting really hit home to me because I thought of her.
Thank you for sharing and I am so glad you have Ella and get to experience the joys she brings you! I hope to meet her some day! I show Thomas her photos every time we look at your blog and there's a little girl in our swim class that sort of resembles her (not nearly as lovely) but he always points to her and says "Baby Ella".
You're awesome!! I can tell you the best thing you can do for anyone going through infertility is just what you did in your post, validate! I felt so empty, lost and MAD for a long time, I really had to mourn not being able to be pregnant. For a long time I didn't want to adopt, I wanted my OWN kid I wanted to be pregnant. When the time was right my heart softened and I realized I just wanted to be a mother. I'm grateful adoption was right for us! When I saw Eden for the first time, I knew she was MINE, I felt if my body did was it was suppose to, her spirit would still be in our home, she would just look different (and I don't want that, I love her dark skin!!)Now I don't really care how my children come, just as long as they get here.
What an emotional, loving post. I am also sad for all those women and admire their courage.
Thanks for the great post!! That's one thing I will never understand! All you can do is keep high hopes and pray for the best!!
thanks for the post ashley. it is so true. i think we all take the miracle of life a little too for granted, because it really is a miracle. i know that everyone, whether in this life, or the next, will have a chance to be a mother.
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