The last week has been one of the most emotional and over whelming of my entire life. I don't think it would be fair to not publicly thank some very special people.
First off. Thank you to anyone who even thought about us for a moment, or sent a prayer our way. We have needed them and they are much appreciated.
Thank you to all the wonderful medical personal that were with us step by step. There is a fantastic nurse in the Sunrise Labor & Delivery OR that I will never forget. I was scared to death for my C section and she held my hand, held me and soothed me through the whole ordeal. I know Heavenly Father put her there because I needed her understanding and compassion. The anesthesiologist was also an amazing man. He was a high councilman for his stake and had a calm voice. He knew how scared I was and made sure he was extra careful so I wouldn't be afraid.
I am so thankful for my specialist Dr. Wold. He didn't have to do my surgery, but he chose to. It meant so much to have a familiar face in the OR. He is an amazing doctor and also knew I was scared. He brought my daughter very safely into this world and talked to me the whole time so I wouldn't be afraid.
I don't know where I would be with out my husband. He has done some serious dirty work. He has dressed me, and cleaned me and cared for me. He has been a patient, willing slave for a week and has never even frowned about it. He has jumped every time I asked for something. He has been in charge when I just didn't want to be. He has sheltered me and lifted me up and I don't know what I would do with out him.
I am so thankful for my sister. She has taken my daughter and treated her like one of her own, so my mom could have a break. I know she has thought of me and understood me. I feel like we share this private secret now that we have both have had C sections. I aways had sympathy for her, but I never knew how scary and painful it was!
Most of all I am so thankful for my mom. She has had Ella for almost a week. I was so worried about Ella being there with her, because sometimes Ella can be really intense! My mom kept telling me how good she has been, and I realized it wasn't Ella who made that environment. It was my mom. She made Ella feel safe, and loved and cared for her with all her heart. I could trust her with out question and knew Ella was safe and happy the whole time. It was hard to leave Ella. I haven't ever done it before. But I knew she was in hands more capable than mine. There is not a big enough thank you or a way to repay such a thing. I routinely take my mom for granted and this week showed me just how much she does for me and how much she means to my family. I love her and my dad so much and I am so glad they are my parents. I am so glad they were able to take my daughter into their home and love her so much, she didn't even realize I was gone.
It has been a very emotional last couple of days. I love my new little girl so much. I have kept a vigilant heart, that everything is going to be okay. I have to keep that feeling or I might just collapse. I am thankful for her little spirit and I am praying that one day I am going to look back on this and remember how hard it was, but see her and have graciousness that she thrived.
Words are something I pride myself with being able to use. I feel like I have the ability to put thoughts down on paper and use them to describe my feelings. But today there are no words. I am so thankful and blessed. I can only use those basics to describe what is in my heart, and sometimes the basic is the most powerful.
2 comments:
I think your words... are perfect!
Where would we be without Mom's, sisters, husbands and prayers. (add doctors and nurses to the list)
Hugs to you Ashley!
ToOdLeS.
huge hugs and lotsa prayers
xo
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